The Ekalaka Eagle - Your Community Builder

For all but eight years of my life, I have lived on the east slopes of the Rocky Mountain front range out of Augusta and Big Timber, Montana. For the half century (approximately in case you are doing the math) that I have lived in the wind, I have tried to get used to it, but I don’t think one can get used to wind.

Because it is futile to fight the wind, I have decided to try to put a positive spin on it. For example, if you have something that you no longer want, you don’t have to haul it to the dump--just leave it out and a 90 mph gust will take it somewhere where you will likely never see it again. If you live in a windy town and want to use this method of tidying up, choose a building lot on the west side of town. We lived on the west side of town for a couple years, and our Australian Shepherd, Sam, would blow across town all the time, but the Animal Control Officer always seemed skeptical of that excuse.

People who live in the wind know that you must exit a car one door at a time. The downwind side of the vehicle must empty first followed by the upwind side so that nothing important blows out of the car including small children. In fact, if you want to detail your car cheaply, park the vehicle facing north, throw open all the doors at once, wait 30 seconds, and you will have saved yourself the price of an expensive detail. If the doors happen to blow off or become sprung, it is probably best not to mention your auto detailing method to the insurance adjuster.

Women who live in windy areas have really bad hair days pretty much every day from November until April, but it doesn’t matter, because every woman in town has the same windblown look. I do believe that wind causes male pattern baldness. Before we were married, my husband had a full head of hair. When he moved to Big Timber either his hair blew out or perhaps he had to wear his hats so tight that they cut off the circulation to his hair follicles. I would suggest Rogaine or hair plugs to him, but I am afraid that perhaps his hair would only grow on the downwind side, and he would end up looking like a windblown tree. In fact, I have seen men with downwind side hair who have tried to grow it out and coax it over to the upwind side. When their hats blow off, it is a hair raising experience!

Consumers want lean meat, so I believe cattle buyers should pay premium prices for cattle raised in windy areas. A cow has to be a lean, mean, milking machine just to catch up with her hay when the wind is gusting up to 90 mph. In vo-ag classes in windy areas, students must solve problems such as this one: If the feed truck is traveling at 5 mph with a 95 mph tailwind, how many miles upwind from the cattle should the rancher begin feeding the hay?

After days of relentless wind, Big Timber native Mike Long, who moved out of the wind when he moved to Bozeman, posted on Facebook: “I always wondered why there was never a murder caused by the wind. A wife, say, would be charged with stabbing her husband to death with a butcher knife. She would be on trial for her life and would be brought up to testify in her own defense. With minimal coaxing from her defense attorney, she would say, ‘Well, you see, the wind was absolutely howling for 3 days and nights straight. We were stuck in that house together, and that one piece of fascia was making that non-rhythmic banging noise, and that one window that we could never get to seal was making that out-of-tune whistling noise, and I saw the knife lying there and thought...’

Then the jury would stand up - en masse - and say, ‘Well for God’s sake, why didn’t you say so? You’re free to go--it was perfectly understandable and justifiable!’”

They say hell will be fire and brimstone. I don’t believe it. Hell will be 40 degrees F with a 40+ mph wind blowing into your face so that no matter which way you turn, you can’t get away from it. (Oh yeah, and that one window will be making that out-of-tune whistling noise for all eternity.)

My featured cook this week is Amy Huddleston from Rock Springs, Wyoming. Thanks, Amy! Amy noted that the cookie recipe from Ana Eleanor Eckberg Hillman is representative of her family’s Swedish heritage.

Swedish Date Cookies:

1 C. butter

1 C. white sugar

Beat together then add:

2 egg yolks

1/2 C. sour cream

1 t. vanilla

Beat together then mix together:

1/2 t. nutmeg

1/2 t. salt

1/2 t. baking soda

3-4 C. sifted flour

Roll out dough about 1/4 inch thick, and cut into round circles. Punch holes in top of 1/2 cookies before baking (Amy uses a vanilla extract lid to make the hole.) Bake at 350 degrees for about 10 minutes until lightly browned on the edges.

Date Filling

1 1/2 lbs dates chopped

Add enough water to cover and cook on the stovetop until smooth and mushy. Then add 1/2 C. brown sugar. Put 1 t. of date mixture on top of cooled cookies and top each with a cookie with a hole in it. Store in an airtight container.

Amy’s Oyster Stew:

2 C. milk,

1 T. butter

1 t. Worcestershire sauce

2 cans oysters

Microwave first three ingredients until warmed to serving temperature. Then microwave 2 cans of oysters and add to the milk mixture. Season to taste with salt and pepper and serve.

Amy’s Caramels:

2 sticks butter

1 lb. brown sugar

1 can sweetened condensed milk

1 C. light Karo syrup

Boil all ingredients over medium heat, stirring constantly, to medium hard ball stage (245 degrees on a candy thermometer). Pour into a buttered pan. Cool. Cut into bite sized pieces and wrap in waxed paper. Store in the refrigerator.